It's just after midnight. I stayed up late so I could record my newest meditation. I was really excited about it and I enjoy working late even when I'm tired. I had it all recorded and was half way through the editing when my computer crashed. Not a full on crash, that's kind of 90's. More of just the program I was using quiting unexpectedly. I sat in horror for a second, wondering if it had auto-saved. I already knew the answer. It's not that kind of program. I reopened to an empty screen and sat quiet for a moment. I wasn't sure if I should laugh or what since what I was recording is called, "Surrender and Allow."
I decided to surrender and start writing a new blog post. My browser then crashed. Okay. I give in. Now I'm allowing... and I'm drinking beer. Salud and goodnight. Hopefully there are no glitches tomorrow.
© Photographer: Olgalis | Agency: Dreamstime.com
Last night I had a dream that was a powerful metaphor for change. I was with my family in a hotel. As they walked about the patio I hung around in a body of water surrounding the hotel. I suddenly realized the water was stagnate and how gross it was. After this realization I still waded around for a bit, looking at the pond scum and scenery, unsure what to do. I then decided the water was just too gross and got out.
Water in dreams is often a reflection of where you are in life. For example, murky water you can't see through might show up in times of heavy confusion. Being on a river with raging rapids could mean something is going too fast and you feel you're losing control. For me, the stagnate water reflected my stuck (yet comfortable) feelings and the fact that I could change things whenever I wanted. All I had to do was realize where I was and embrace being somewhere else.
It seems more so now than ever that people are desperate to find their purpose in life. Not eager. Desperate. I believe the reason so many people feel frustrated and upset is because they're looking everywhere but where they should: right inside themselves. You are the purpose. You are the question and the answer at the same time. What is your life's purpose? You. Your existence is the reason you're here. You are here to explore that existence to its fullest. If you feel depressed, then that is part of your exploration. If you feel frustrated because you hate your job, then there's something there for you to learn or grow from. If you are blissed out and exploding rainbows out of your eyeballs everywhere you go, then that's where you're at. Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, you're living your life's purpose. You are learning and exploring and adding to the richness of other people's lives by being uniquely you.
There is something besides a life purpose we all have. This is something that we often mistake our purpose to be. This would be your passion. Your passion is something else entirely. Your passion is what you might feel you came here to do. Or what makes you feel fulfilled. Or what makes you feel of service, or something like that. Your passion might be what you get up in the morning excited to do and live. This one is a bit more complicated. I can't tell you what your passion is or how to live it.
I can only reassure you that you have a purpose. You've had it since you came soaring into this world. The reason we get confused is because we often feel if we aren't doing something then we don't matter.
Doing is entirely different than being. What you do in a day or a life, that's entirely up to you. It doesn't change that you're important just as you are. Have you ever known someone with a mental disability? Someone who may never work a day in their life, they may never even speak in complete sentences, but that person might be the most important person in the world to you. Would you tell that person they have no purpose? Or would you think, "Your existence is your purpose. How you are is so unique and gives me so much perspective, and I'm just so glad you're here."
Some of the most important people in this world will never achieve much notoriety. But it doesn't matter. Because they're teaching us. In their own quiet way, they're reminding us it's entirely possible to live a rich life without using a computer, an iPhone or ever being in a hurry. They're teaching us about compassion, love, purity, innocence, honesty, and so much more.
So keep breathing. Keep being you. That's all you need to be living your purpose.
Join me for a 7 minute meditation. Relaxing music plays as you breathe deep and visualize a thread coming down from a star and through your body.
I know we're always telling ourselves and each other not to compare who we are to anyone else. There's nothing new about this. I just want to bring up these two simple words as a gentle reminder also not to compare your spiritual journey.
The reason is, that well meaning people (me included) will tell you how this or that happened, and how great it felt, and how you have to try it. Your friend may have stood on one foot while croaking like a frog and had the most transcendental, mind blowing experience of her life. She tells you about "Frogging" one day when you're feeling down. You go home and try it, and damn it, you feel nothing. Worse than nothing, you feel like an idiot because you're standing on one foot and croaking like a frog.
This isn't to say we shouldn't share the things that transform and uplift our lives. We just shouldn't expect the same results. We're all so different, and yet sometimes, when it comes to the spiritual stuff, we all expect to have the same experience. And when we don't, the results can be devastating. We might toss something in the trash that could be just what we need - only not in the way we expect and maybe not even in that moment.
A lot of people are talking about Source Energy these days. It's a pretty common term in spiritual circles (maybe also at the PG&E power plant, I don't know, but that's not the kind of energy I'm talking about here). I myself have begun to use the term Source Energy for what I used to think of us a greater or higher power.
Trying to define what Source Energy is could turn into a lengthy discussion. It would involve me telling you what I think it is, what others think it is, what's in between all that, and cross examining those parts until I'm drinking coffee straight from the pot and furiously trying to edit down a million words. So rather than me getting tweaked out on coffee I'd like to give a short note on one way to think of it: Source Energy is the vague and open ended way we can look at all concepts for God merged, our creation, and the mysterious forces in our lives.
I would like to try and get even more simple about Source Energy. I would say it's pure love. Maybe even Love with a capitol L. A love so grand, so rich, so thick that you're like 'this is love beyond love. This is a Love that changes my life." Now if you've been in love you might think you know what I'm talking about. But without sounding patronizing, I want to say as gently as I can, that this Love goes waaaay beyond that. Even if you were Romeo and Juliet, or Britney and Justin back in their denim matching days, or Prince William and Kate, I know there is a love that goes beyond that. I know because I experienced it once in meditation.
The Magic Cloud meditation will be up very, very soon (update 9/24/13 - it's up!). I'm really excited to share this meditation with everyone. It's one I wrote truly from the heart for people who've struggled as I have. I've had a long battle with depression and self-esteem issues.
There is of course more to the magic cloud than lifting your spirits. For those looking to take their spiritual practice to the next level, this meditation can help open the door to communicating with your higher self and even receiving messages from it. How does it do that? You'll just have to check it out!
The Color Meditation is just over 2 minutes. I created it for everyone but especially for those that have never meditated before. It's my way of saying thank you for coming to my page. It's also my way of saying please remember to pause and breathe. Two minutes of deep breathing with your mind focused on various colors could shift your entire day for the better.
This meditation is a great way to introduce kids to meditation. Please see my blog post for more ideas on how to talk to kids about meditation. If you'd like to download this meditation for yourself or anyone else use the link below. Be sure to RIGHT click and then select SAVE AS. If you left click the file will play, but it will go into a temporary folder on your computer.
If you like this free meditation please share it with others!
Today I came across the most incredible album. It's called 33 bowls and is created from Tibetan Singing bowls. Tibetan singing bowls are said to have mysterious healing properties on the mind, body and soul. At the very least they will relax you and allow your mind to drift away from the daily chatter.
Here is what the artist who created the album cover said about 33 Bowls, "It connects me back to something, an older language of sound that just resonates in a way that doesn’t even have words. Feels like I’m joining an ancestry, it doesn’t feel like my emotion…something that’s been dormant, becomes enlivened.”
Most people struggle with keeping their focus and attention away from their failures and embarassments. We generally have a microscope set on maximum zoom to all of the things we so desperately want to forget. It's sometimes unbelievable how low we'll make ourselves feel because of things that didn't work out (or at least not how we wanted). These supposed setbacks range from massive shakeups like divorce to thinking we're waving at our friend Jim when - gasp! - that's not Jim! Oh the horror of doing something weird and awkward in public. We let those moments of feeling stupid hang on us like bags of cement, thinking that's all we are. Just crazy, stupid losers getting divorced and accidentally waving at strangers. If we could all just slam on our self-hating brakes for a moment and collectively go, "WOAH! Why am I racing to Shit-on-me-ville, and was that Starbucks always there???"
In my previous post "All the Right Places" I mentioned a book I had spent years writing. The book never sold, and it really knocked me on my back. It was that horrible feeling of having the wind knocked out of you. You know you're going to breath again, but for those terrifying few seconds you think you're lingering between life and death. It's true that the odds of making it as a writer are slim, and there was no guarantee of anything happening. But that doesn't take away from the sting that everyone knows I tried, and I failed.
For about a year after, I felt it wasn't worth it. I know there's a lot of people on the fence thinking about taking a plunge into something themselves. If you're one of those people, considering writing your own book, recording music, or starting a business, you probably want some reassurance it'll work out. You might be looking into other success stories for the courage to go for it. You've probably read a million stories about how so-and-so went for it, and, KAZAM! Now they're living their dream and richer than the ShamWow guy. Woot woot!
Of course, for every ShamWow guy there's someone who saw their efforts fizzle out. Now I'm one of those people, and if you're looking for reassurance that you shouldn't try, that's it's not worth it, then you're in the wrong place. I know you should try, and I hope you feel the same way by the time you read to the end of this post.
This short video can be used for meditation, affirmations, or a brief moment of reflection. It is a short reflection on the moon and how it can inspire us in our lives. It is intended to help you raise your self-esteem, relax, and enjoy who you are to your fullest ability.
Background music "Letting Go" by Christopher Lloyd Clarke. Licensed by RoyaltyFreeMeditationMusic.com
There's nothing better than being totally unsure of yourself and where the eff you are and then having a book called All the Right Places showing up on your doorstep. Actually, the book came with other books, in a box, and carried by Jaap (that J is like a Y). Jaap is a former neighbor of mine from Holland.
This was naturally back when I was living in Holland, which I'll probably refer to a lot. Not because Holland itself is great material for uplifting people, but because it was a challenging time. It helps me relate to others currently in the midst of wanting to pull their hair out and scream in frustration. It's one of those things that makes me now tell myself, "Melissa, if you did that, you can damn well get through today."
Welcome to my new website! I will be adding new posts sharing inspirational and uplifting writing soon. Book mark this page and check back in soon. Thank you for coming by.
If there's one thing I've learned in my life it's that a truly self-empowered state comes from a feeling deep within. It comes from feeling, with my whole body and soul, that the Universe sees me as a vital part of it. When I feel into how much the Universe loves me, how it just knows it would be incomplete without me, I can feel how truly loved and supported I am.
I can feel the love in my heart, the love that connects me to all the beautiful things I dream of. I can feel God shining onto me, and I feel myself shining back. As we commune and I drop my walls I feel like I'm coming home. I can feel the power of higher dimensions of consciousness guiding me, wanting me to succeed.
They want me to feel happy and expanded and safe and powerful because I am as important to to the Universe as the whole Universe is to me. If one cell in my body, one single cell, fell into dis-ease I would give it unconditional love and support. I would send it waves of love, nourish it with good food, drink plenty of water, and all in hopes that it returned to health and harmony. I would do this, because it is a part of me, each cell is vital in making me whole. You are the same to the Universe. The Universe wants you to be happy, healthy and whole because without you, it's incomplete.
When I feel into that, into the knowing that vast and powerful resources are asking, begging, pleading with me to stop trying so hard and to let them help, I feel empowered.
I feel it's all okay, it's all taken care of. And that is what I love the most. I feel it. I feel it as I go about my day. I don't have to think it or affirm it or keep reminding myself of it. Whenever I feel lost, alone, sad or scared I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and I feel that the atoms of my body are composed of the same material as the stars. Then I feel the cosmic connection I have to those stars, and then I feel the power, the literal power of all that mass, all that hydrogen burning and churning and crushing down on a core so hot it lights up entire worlds.
This state of empowerment within me feels like warmth. It feels like ease. It feels good. Really, really good. And that's all being self-empowered is. Feeling good from within.
If you need a little boost with your own sense of self-power, I've made a guided meditation to help tune you in and reconnect you to all that you are. You can play the abridged version here for free. It's 11 minutes long and contains beautiful background music called "Heaven and Earth," by Christopher Lloyd Clarke. The full version of this meditation will take you on a deeper journey, and is 32 minutes. If you enjoy this and decide to purchase the full, you will get a free copy of this abridged version with it (it's $5 and available for instant download).