Lately I've been having the experience of watching the money in my bank account dwindle. I think we've all experienced this at some point in our lives. For artists, entrepreneurs and anyone trying to be a self-made person you probably experience this often (at least I do).
I know that the last thing to do when this happens is to PANIC and FREAK OUT about what I'm going to do. That shuts down the flow of inspiration and just brings me more things to worry about.
A few days before I'd saved a flyer for a place that had $2 slices of pizza and $2 beers. I decided to go and give them a visit, get out of the house, and just be in the flow of life. It always uplifts my energy, and based on the law of like attracts like, getting out and enjoying life is generally good mojo.
After I got my pizza I ordered my $2 beer. The bartender opens it and I hand her my debit card. I had assumed it would be fine because I'd just used it to pay for the pizza. But then... dramatic Jaws music... she tells me there's a $10 minimum.
The difference between $10 and $2 is so nominal that I could have easily shrugged and said, "Whatevs." But I didn't. I felt the PANIC and the FREAK OUT come over me. I had a PLAN coming into this and it revolved around a $2 beer. I asked how much the beers on tap were, but this only made me feel worse because it was going to destroy my plan. I had a plan damn it! Hadn't the Universe heard me??? I SAID I HAD A PLAN!
I sat down with my beer and the train of dark, intense thoughts began chugging at full speed. Why did I think I should go out for pizza and a beer? Why didn't I stay home and eat leftovers? Don't I know how to be responsible? How did I even get to this point? Why am I fucking everything up? What am I doing with my life???????
I tried to calm myself, but I felt lost and sad, which only made me feel this whole thing was stupid and I shouldn't have come. I calculated that to meet the minimum, I would have to have at least three drinks. This isn't an obscene amount, but I wasn't in the mood for it, because I may have mentioned this, but I had a plan!
I decided the best thing to do would be to just secretly pay someone else's tab. That way they would be delightfully surprised and I could get going. I finished my pizza (which was so delicious) and went to pay.
The bartender curtly informed me that no one had an open tab. I sighed and said it was fine, just charge me $10 for the one. She asked if I was sure, and I said I was sure. She takes my card to the machine and she's holding her hand over it, literally inches away from sliding it.
And then a man shows up, seemingly out of nowhere. He orders a $6 drink! I have never been so excited that a stranger ordered a cocktail. Woohoo! Now I could pay for something! I offered to pay for it because I would be spending the money either way. And then... he offered to pay for me.
To know he was being nice just for the sake of being nice was such a good feeling. I was obviously leaving so there was no pretense or ulterior motive on his part. He was genuinely being nice. I thanked him and he said "Come on, I'm a hugger!" He gave me a hug, and he didn't know this, but I really did need a hug right then.
Just when I thought the whole plan had been blown, an angel in a crisp button down shirt showed up and showed me that magic always finds a way. You just have to trust and let go of that death grip on plans working out exactly as you'd intended.
Trust, take a deep breath, and try to find something to momentarily shift your energy to something better, which is how I suspect I manifested a happy ending. I had decided paying for someone else was a good option, and this uplifted and relaxed me, which allowed the real magic to find a way through.